Here’s a scenario I’m sure you’re VERY familiar with, especially if you’ve been wanting to try something new for a while, or you’re self-employed or a side-hustler.
😄 You have an exciting idea
📅 You start planning what you might do and how you could launch it
🤯 It becomes an unwieldy list of things you need to figure out and decisions you need to make
😩 You don't do anything with it because it's now overwhelming and unappealing
I talk a lot about ADHD motivation - how we can lose interest when novelty wears off, or be stunted by fear and perfectionism. But today I want to focus on a related but slightly different aspect…
being paralysed by the unknowable.
An idea unrealised
Last year my mind was noodling on how I could help people with ADHD in a more quick access, more affordable way and I had (what I felt) was a GENIUS idea!
“Speak & Solve” - a 48-hour turnaround service where you can send me a voice-note thought dumping your challenge and I’ll create a visual map of it, and put together some kind of plan or resource.
But then… I didn’t do it.
I got stuck on these details and endless what ifs (to name a few!):
How long should I limit the voice note to?
What can I realistically help solve in such a bitesize way?
How much should I charge?
What platform should I use?
What if it takes longer than I thought and I can’t manage the workload?
What if no-one buys it?
What if I can’t solve all their problems in one go?
Yes some of this is fear based. But lots of it is just practical. Practical things that need to be decided. The ADHD brain does not likey that.
Decision Making & Executive Dysfunction
Decisions are hard for ADHDers. Decisions involve a multitude of executive function capabilities that our brains find trickier.
Emotional regulation helps people stay calm and steady in the face of overwhelming choices
Working memory helps people hold relevant information in mind whilst making choices
Planning and prioritisation helps guide the organisation of information to make a decision and choose the best path forwards
Pssst… want to become a more confident decision maker? I've created a 40-page workbook with practical exercises to help you overcome common decision making challenges. [Link to download]
You’re trying to know the unknowable
The thing is, when it comes to lots of these details and lots of decisions we need to make in life - you are trying to know the unknowable, whilst feeling a great deal of pressure to have the right answer.
Because it feels like you can’t possibly move forwards without the answer.
You can. I promise you, you can.
You just need to get out of hypothetical land.
Hypothetical land
Hypothetical land is that place you find yourself in when trying to make a decision about something that hasn’t happened yet.
Should I start that podcast I've been thinking about for months?
Should I launch my creative side business now or wait until I have more experience?
Should I pivot my business to focus on a different niche?
You want to cling to some kind of certainty about your decision. You want to KNOW you have the perfect solution before you launch the thing. Or you want to know for sure you’re making the right decision, before you make it.
The problem with hypothetical land
The thing about hypothetical land is there's zero true reference point for you to make decisions from.
Because you don't know.
And in reality, the only way to know is to do something and get some information. Create a direct data and feedback loop for yourself.
It can feel vulnerable and exposing. What!? Try something when I haven’t figured it all out yet!? Yes it’s uncomfortable. But the way I see it - it’s a sharper, more intense discomfort to overcome a CONSTANT undercurrent of agonising pressure to figure out the unknowable.
Getting out of hypothetical land
Rather than trying to agonise over finding the right answer to your questions, instead answer yourself with this…
“I don’t know. How can I find out?”
Because the truth is, you don’t know. And you will never find out until you do something. Something that gives you direct information to use as your compass for this decision, and future one’s.
I’ll go first
Sometimes the best way out of hypothetical land is to just... stop being hypothetical.
So in the spirit of practising what I preach. I’ll go first. I don’t have Speak & Solve all figured out yet, but I’m gonna try it and see what I learn.
I'm looking for 3 volunteers to help me test it for free.
Leave your name and email here and I’ll be in touch with info on how it works and a secure dropbox link. First come, first served! Limited to 3 people.
In other news…
I’ve been doing plant stuff recently! Split my pophos and spider plants up and trying to nurture them into flourishing. Something about this Spring/ Summer season’s got me all - naturey🪴🌵🌿🌱
I recently chatted to Jaz Marfo about harnessing play and creativity in your life and career -
Rachel Walker | ADHD Career & Life Coach | 📽️ Youtube | Work with me 👯 1:1 Coaching | Group Programme | Workshops & Speaking
Love the idea! I sent in my email but I'm probably too late. That's what I get for procrastinating haha. I've been planting too and buying more flowers and plants at the store for in my house. I'm not a green thumb but getting more plants indoors makes me much happier.